Conversation I had with my mom the other day:
Me: MOM! I never realized I had zero kitchen supplies until Nat & Les moved out! I went to go grab a pot the other day and there weren't any!
Mom: Dude. You should throw yourself a shower.
There's no date on the invite because if I set a specific time, that means I'd have to make hors d'oeuvres and cookies, but as we all know, I have nothing to make them with. So please just show up. I honestly have nothing and I need people to buy me things because I'm sick of being such a good friend and just purchasing home goods for other people.