Friday, January 18, 2013

3 The Life of a Pencil Sharpener

Let me tell you, it's not too long.

Why does an electric pencil sharperner which costs an average of $32.81 last an average of 2.4 months in my classroom?
I'm this close to putting a hidden camera up to make sure the kids aren't putting glue and paper clips in it.

Okay, the first electric pencil sharperner I had my first year of teaching died because kids started sharpening their crayons and erasers in it. At one point, I even saw a little hardened Elmer's Glue in there. I was a brand new teacher and didn't realize I had to be so explicit as to tell them to not sharpen anything but PENCILS in the PENCIL sharpener. I have not made that mistake since. So please tell me why so many have died since then.

A few weeks ago one of my kids said, "Miss Stolworthy, there's an angry mouse in the pencil sharpener."
Me: "Huh? Why do you think that?"
"Well, because when I stick my pencil in, it's like 'squeak, squeak, squeak RWOFOONGDOIWENOGSNHSGOI'!!!!!!!"

Yeah that would be a pretty ticked off mouse.

Because of this angry mouse noise, I knew my awesome, super sleek and very quiet Costco pencil sharpener that I had just purchased a couple months previously, was at the end of it's short life.

So now I have yet another fatality to add to my pencil sharpener graveyard in the closet above my sink. May you rest in peace.

I hate you sooo much for dying.

Stay tuned for, "The Life of a Stapler"


  1. Mine died within like a month. And I didn't even let my kids sharpen their pencils!!!

  2. Such a pain, right?! I'm about to go old school here and just start sharpening them with the edge of scissors.

  3. I bought SIX staplers at the beginning of last semester, thinking "Oh look at me, I'm such a nice teacher providing all these staplers for the students to use." Guess how many still worked by winter break? 0. And I teach HS!



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