{4 unrelated thoughts. these random rambling posts could realllllly get me in trouble. whatever.}
1. The other night at a party I was talking, hands flying as always (because that's how i talk), when a boy comes up & says, "WHOA I need to hear this convo! Those are the most gossipy hands I've ever seen!"
Get away boy. We were just gossipping about how annoying you are.
2. “Getting revenge on a guy is just not worth it to me. The best revenge I can think of is becoming famous.”-Carrie Underwood
Well that's just the best attitude I've heard of so far! I knew I always liked her.
3. When I was in first grade, I went up to my teacher's desk & saw a magazine that said "World's Prettiest Girl," and then the picture of the girl was plastered over the entire front of it.
I honestly thought to myself, "That's the prettiest girl? When I'm 14," (HAH) "I will definitely be prettier than her. I will be the prettiest girl in the world."
HOLY CONCEITED!
Can't believe I thought that.
Only problem is, when I was 14 I had braces. Otherwise, without a doubt i would've been the world's prettiest girl.
4. Let's switch gears for a second, can we?
Alright.
I've avoided this for far too long.
Hmmm, how should i say it? maybe i should just do it in a letter form.
Here it goes:
Dear Husband,
You better be bangin hot. You better be smart, charismatic & nice. If you make a billion dollars, I won't complain. You better have a testimony & you better make me laugh. Is that too much to ask for? It shouldn't be for all the %$^&* i've been through.
You're kind of ticking me off lately. Haven't seen your face around & it's getting a little annoying. I'm in no rush for a ring, but could you at least try making an appearance at some of the Provo All Star parties I've been hitting up recently? Oh, you're too good for that? That's my boy! I knew you were exactly what I was looking for.
Anyways, I'm terribly upset with you. You're making this much much harder on me. So why don't you just think about what you've done & we can talk about it in the morning. And when I say "talk about it," I mean, we can plan the wedding. Flowers. Bridesmaids. Appetizers. "I love you Binky, but I don't have to like you right now."
Love your adoring wife,
Love your adoring wife,
Danielle
P.S. I think it's about time we stop pretending i'm having an affair with Sara Mildenhall. You know it & I know it. The truth is, she's been there for me when you haven't. I hope we can get this all figured out.
Okay, that's the greatest thing I've ever read. all of it.
ReplyDeleteThis ROCKS.
ReplyDeletebah hahaha. I love you. If you could tell your husband to get in touch with my husband I'd really appreciate it...I mean I'm sure they're just super busy with Law school or starting up their amazing multi-million dollar company right?
ReplyDeleteThe $$$ part is over-rated, but yeah...go for the good looks and great testimony! Thatta girl Danielle!
ReplyDeleteooh...I re-read and, um, "smart" is a REALLY good one too-like your daddy! I loved your funny ramblings...do it again sometime, k?
ReplyDeleteFun to read, Danielle! You are a crackup!
ReplyDeleteI love this! That's an awesome letter you've got there.:)
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA! :) Oh dani! Way to say exactly what so many girls are feeling. Its hard to sift through all the ridiculous boys in provo to find a good one. promise he'll come around though!
ReplyDeleteThat letter is funny. I think. I mean, it was meant to be funny, right?
ReplyDeleteAs always...you make me smile!
ReplyDeleteI love you and I love this letter, and I completely 100 percent totally agree with and sympathize with every word.
ReplyDeletecan we gossip at another party soon? thanks.
love,
anna :)