Friday, January 14, 2011

When asked my senior year of high school what I was going to be when I grow up, I answered for everyone to see and hear, "the next Oprah Winfrey."

I left for college with my Oprah dreams still intact, but seeing as Oprah was not going anywhere anytime soon, I settled for a major that entertained a smaller audience in not only numbers but stature.

I've often been told I should have a talk show. I'm positive it's because I'm a little chatty. I'm a girl from the South and we have the gift of gab, no doubt. Recently, a few people have asked me if I knew Oprah was looking for a new host and encouraged me into trying to fill those shoes. I just knew it was destiny. I felt as if Oprah was finally handing me that golden mic (as pictured below).
Wait, what's that you say?
TRYOUTS already took place?
Wait, WHAT?
THESE are the people up for the job?
I'm laughing. Laughing so hard. That's a lie! I'm crying. None of these crazies have what it takes. None of them are as normal as me, and Oprah...........
none of them are as rich as Oprah and I. None of them have dads that both live in Franklin, Tennessee.
That's THREE major things Oprah & I have in common and they chose the huge chef and lady in curlers. Appalled.
I guess I'll just go back to school on Monday and continue with what I do, Laffy Taffy jokes & recess problem solving.
This is terribly depressing. I could be changing the world. I could be increasing my pay check by at least double. I could be handing out my favorite things.
America, you will regret this. I have some super awesome favorite things.

I'm just a little bummed that my life is over, that's all.


  1. i dont understand why youre so bummed.
    this is YOU.

  2. hahahahahha. oprah will make a second opportunity for you. i can feel it.

    in the mean time. i can bring over my oprah 20th anniversary dvd set and we could watch some episodes while laughing and crying. seriously amazing. call me for the date sista.

  3. Truthfully I'm pretty sad you didn't try out too! What if you won, and you had a talk show? It would be so entertaining. Disappointment.

  4. I wouldn't count on your life being over, Sweetheart, though I know you were joking. You have such a lot to give and tons of important things to do! I'm excited for you and looking forward to watching it all unfold!
    Love you, Danielle!



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